You can leave a text or voicemail at 773.888.2157
or email me at: garrymeiershow@garrymeier.com

Here’s a running list of all of my past clown names

Heated Orifice
Lumpy Treasures
Thundery Downpours
Clammy Airmass
Chunky Grill
Flaming Satan Pit
Leaky Ponds
Gluteus Maximus
IV Drip
Meat Skewer
Drunk Challenge
Hotter Noodles
Chippy Tooth
Lingering Moisture
Bulky Stools
Dunkin’ Dicks
Short Term Shenanigans
Patchy Frost
Drooling Raccoons
Constricted Pupils
Grungy Rubber Cup Sole
Kinks and Fantasies
Furry Intruder
Run Amok
Altitude Sickness
Unprotected Sex
Vicious Snowflake
Beefy Tubes
Dark Green Stool
Sweat Palms
Any Politician
Counterfeit Female Viagra
Stop Being Horny
3 Breasts
Melvina, Paulina, Lunt
Skirmish
Escalated to a Tussle
Fuzzballs
Explosion of the Eyeball
Shoes, Clothes, Bones
Stinky Bombers
Risselty Rasselty
Major Hangtime
Patchy Drizzle
Little Squirrelly
Creamy French
Sump Pump
Sushi Freezer
Slightly Damaged
Slippery Slope
Missy Tops
Missy Bottoms
Pimping & Pandering
Loose & Flakey Paint
U.S. Senate
Boofing
Devil’s Triangle
Drooling Raccoons
Constricted Pupils
Dong Linger
Patchy Frost
Horrific Freak Accident
Mysterious Leakage
Muffed Punt
Foamy Rivers
Breezy Winds
Soggy Shoes
Pizza Mouth Burn
Gurgling hole
Spoke in Gibberish
Guy Guy birdie
Main shaft
Erections That Last Over 4 Hours
Hot Holding Station
Freak Accident
Les Tippy
Police Sores
Robo Trousers
Brine Shrimp
Unicorn poop.
Raggedy mouth.
Sea monkey wrangler.
Honey glazed yams.
Bony Passages
Pepperoni Sticks
Googly Eyes
Itchy Insulation
Black Bubbles
Toilet Plume
Touchy Coach
Handsy
Bulky Stools
Dip In The Sea
Major Stupido
Venom Exposure
Spiny Tail
Spool of Turf
Teddy Mattress
Debris and Needles
Tragic Accident
Bent Spoons
Open Containers
Lunch Meat
Cycle the Bolt
Large Bulge
Bitchin’ Cool
Soft pretzel
Glock
Unnamed Holiday Maker
Rack the slide
Itchy Sensation
Fake Dentist
Throbbing Gristle
Stinky Pine Cones
Maximum Profit
Severe Burns & Blisters
Poison Parsnip
Defective Bushings
Open Lewdness
Bloody Welts
Fruity Flavors
Dirty Socks
Squeaky Wipers
Blurry Vision
Wet Unrolled Condom
Creamy Fudge
Loose Wheel
Brain Pan Jostling
Abnormally Shaky
Serial Poopers
Sweet Melon
Chicken Diapers
Stinky Slippery Asian Carp
Lazy Tazey
Squamous Cell Carcinoma
Watermelon Load
Small Box
Soft Box
Boozy Wasp
Little Behind
Penis Stump
Plastic Bladder
Sky Puke
Moderately less nuts
Gondola Arm Pins
Rusty Old Fuel Tank
Rusty Shed
Metal Prosthetics
Sudden Severe Pain
Corpus Cavernosa
Eggplant Shaped
Penile Fractures
Blunt Trauma
Snapping Sensation
Novelty Bottle Openers
Soapy Residue
Flamming Tarballs
Glitter Nipples
Horny Dolphins
Loose Bison
Manual Breast Pump
Rug Burns
Passing Excessive Gas
Merchant Seaman
Extremely Large Protuberance
Chicken Nuggets
Elephant Ears
Undescended Testicles
Worn-out Bedspread
Unvented Pipes
Noxious Gas Fumes
Rotten Egg Smell